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Hollow
“Hollow” 10-27-99 How does one stop missing another? Only if he were cruel could I relish in our separation. Love is the hell I find myself in, Longing for any sign of affection. Once I swore to stop hurting myself, but I lied. Will I ever be able to love again?
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Stop
“Stop” 10-2-99 Maybe if my heart would stop beating, it wouldn’t hurt so badly. And maybe if I could stop breathing, my chest would no longer ache. If I knew how to stop being alive, I wouldn’t feel myself slowly dying. Maybe if I wasn’t hungry, I could eat for energy. And maybe if I could stop crying, I wouldn’t look like hell. If I didn’t love you, my soul could survive. Maybe if my God understands, strength will empower me. And maybe if I hadn’t trusted you, I wouldn’t feel so betrayed. If I could hate you, I wouldn’t have to die. Maybe if I were smarter, I wouldn’t…
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Forget
“Forget” 9-28-99 When we are together, I want us to be one. I miss you when we are apart. I can smell you on my skin, and feel you inside my soul. I am drowning in my sorrows, because when our time together is through, I’m not sure how to breathe without you. I want to feel your touch against my face, and hold you in my arms forever. Part of me will die if you forget me, but I cannot truly live unless I forget you.